"bunch of crazy white people... "

Every Billboard Modern Rock Chart #1 through 2005, listed in order of preference.  

181. Foo Fighters, "All My Life"

November 23, 2002 - January 31, 2003

Showing emo-rockers that they don't have to lose bombastic, novel arrangements to signify as pop, which is cool. He also shows them that they don't have to lose their passive-aggressive lyrical stance, which is not.

Hey don't let it go to waste
I love it but I hate the taste
Weight keeping me down

Done done and on to the next one


182. Sisters Of Mercy, "More"

December 15, 1990 - January 18, 1991

Eurythmics Screwed & Chopped Extended Dance Mix.

Some people get by
With a little understanding
Some people get by
With a whole lot more
I don’t know
Why you gotta be so undemanding
One thing I know
I want more
I want more


183. Psychedelic Furs, "Until She Comes"

September 7 - 20, 1991

It's uninspired and unimpressive, but it takes more than that for the Psychedelic Furs to be unlistenable.

until she comes again
with all my savings and my sins
there's no good reason to begin
until she comes again


184. World Party, "Way Down Now"

June 9 - July 13, 1990

I hadn't heard "Sympathy For The Devil" yet, so there's no reason my middle school self should have known what an unabashed, lightweight Stones rip this song is. Still, I'm a little embarassed. For both of us.

Inside my TV eye
I never stop to wonder why
I'm way down now
I'm way down now


185. Red Hot Chili Peppers, "Californication"

August 12 - 18, 2000

The deepest words of the man's career, a concrete meditation. And if it came on the radio, I wouldn't change the station. In modern rock, there is a lot worse than Californication.

Destruction leads to a very rough road
But it also breeds creation
And earthquakes are to a girl's guitar
They're just another good vibration
And tidal waves couldn't save the world
From Californication


186. U2, "Discotheque"

February 1 - 28, 1997

A throbbing monster of a song.

You know you're chewing bubblegum
You know what that is
But you still want some
You just can't get enough
Of that lovie dovie stuff


187. Jesus Jones, "The Devil You Know"

January 23 - March 5, 1993

Hits harder than "Right Here, Right Now." Less memorable too, which isn't always a crime.

Things aren't what they where, they're what they are
There's no time of our own

And the devil you know is the only one


188. Marcy Playground, "Sex & Candy"

December 27, 1997 - April 10, 1998

An ex-girlfriend once told me she appreciated the reference to "platform double suede." I think that this detail is cancelled out by the reference to "disco Superfly," but I'll cede the point.

I smell sex and candy here
Who's that lounging in my chair
Who's that casting devious stares in my direction
Mama, this surely is a dream


189. Staind, "It's Been Awhile"

April 28 - August 17, 2001

Elliott Smith on steroids, which doesn't mean it's dumber.

And it's been awhile
Since I can say that I wasn't addicted
And it's been awhile
Since I can say I love myself as well
And it's been awhile
Since I've gone and fucked things up just like I always do
And it's been awhile
But all that shit seems to disappear when I'm with you


190. Robyn Hitchcock & The Egyptians, "So You Think You're In Love"

September 2 - October 25, 1991

They say your stupidest song will be your biggest hit.

So you think you're in love,
Yes, you probably are.
But you want to be straight about it,
Oh, you gotta be straight about it now.
So you think you're in love,


191. Audioslave, "Be Yourself"

April 9 - May 6, 2005

Alanis Morrisette for men or Sammy Hagar for a new generation. Pushing wisdom rather than anguish, it's one of the few Chris Cornell tracks where the tumor is benign.

Dont lose any sleep tonight
I'm sure everything will end up alright
You may win love

But to be yourself is all that you can do
To be yourself is all that you can do


192. Cranberries, "Zombie"

October 29 - December 9, 1994

Things Dolores O'Riordan did on "Zombie": yelped more "ih" syllables than Sinead would on an entire album, added an incomptent guitar lick to the band's sympathetically slow lurch, revealed that war in Ireland is stupid, tried to rhyme "violence" with "silence." Our punishment for letting a dream-pop album go platinum.

But you see, it's not me, it's not my family.
In your head, in your head they are fighting,
With their tanks and their bombs,
And their bombs and their guns.
In your head, in your head, they are crying...


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